Goodbye to the blue chair

Today I said goodbye to a little corner of my apartment that has been a very special place to me for the last nearly 4 years.

The corner with the blue chair...

As I was packing up my things this week and reflecting on what has happened in my life over the last few years, my eyes focused in on that chair. It isn't fancy, or lovely or any work of craftsmanship. It is just an old chair that belongs to my landlord.

But as I stared at that old chair, I was struck by the number of moments contained in a single piece of furniture. That chair has served as my quiet place of refuge.

The chair is a reminder of the journey I've been on with the Lord. The first year in my apartment I cried in that chair on numerous occasions- so overwhelmed and at times wondering, "Lord, what am I doing here?? I want to go home!"

I would fall into that chair upon returning from a trip to the US, call my parents and cry on their distant shoulders, aching with homesickness and wondering if I should have just stayed.

In that chair I have laughed in the company of dear friends as we have chatted about life and love and Jesus.

I have shared my heart from that chair as Bible studies have gathered in my home, or as adoptive families have passed through Kiev and stayed a night or two.

In that chair I have read and prayed and developed a deeper love for God's word. I have also been confused, and perplexed, and challenged. I have asked God many questions from that chair. Pages upon pages in my journal have been scribbled as I've sat with my morning coffee balanced on the arm, cuddled up in a blanket and my feet pressed up against the radiator.

I know it is just a piece of furniture, but I had this tinge of sadness as I walked out of the room today for the last time and glanced at the bright blue chair, now devoid of the welcoming red pillow and fuzzy blanket. I felt silly for being sad, but I think what I realized in that moment was that I was closing the chapter on this little part of my Kiev life and stepping into something new-- and that's a little scary. In some respects it would be easier to just stay curled up in my blue chair, because it is safe there- it has become comfortable and familiar.

But in that moment of being tempted to stay, I was reminded of a section of Isaiah that reads :

“But forget all that—it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do a brand new thing. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness for my people to come home. I will create rivers for them in the desert...yes, I will make springs in the desert, so that my chosen people can be refreshed." Isaiah 43: 18-20 (NLT)

Yes, God is doing a new thing. I can see that. Letting go of the blue chair is just a tiny tiny step of faith in that direction. Because in reality, a relationship with the Lord can't ever be confined to the corner of any room.

Isn't my moving helper pretty cute?