Innocence Lost

Last weekend I found myself surrounded by a group of children that are very close to my heart. These children live in Kherson, Ukraine in an orphanage of 220 children. Through summer camps and trips to the United States the last two years, I’ve gotten to know a group of these kids in a unique way and see how they, like all children, are in the process of growing up- right before my eyes.
Upon entering the room where the kids hang-out and play on the weekends, I saw the favored "babysitter" hard at work---otherwise known as the television. Every time I see this influential babysitter keeping the kids entertained I cringe. The kids flip from channel to channel with complete freedom, and the uneasiness grows inside as I see what is shown on regular television in Ukraine. Of course the kids are excited when I come in, as I’m a change to their regular routine. I distract the younger ones, but the older ones are quickly drawn back to the babysitter.

On this trip I’m with my friends Natasha and Erik, who are here pursuing an adoption, and they quickly become new best friends with all my 10-year-old angels who are jabbering away with questions and their fond remembrances of the time recently spent in America.
As always the “foto-operat” or digital camera is a hit and the kids are all begging to take pictures with our cameras and pose as best they can. A couple of these little girls were very excited about being little photographers and asked for permission to take Natasha and Erik’s camera into the other room to have a photo session.

Now anyone who has ever been in Ukraine or Russia will know that Slavic women know how to pose for a picture! If a camera is pulled out, suddenly women will strike a pose quite un-like their everyday posture for the picture about to be taken. Sometimes this can be humorous to watch.
So after the girls came back from their photo session I went through the camera to glance at what they had taken. I guess it didn’t surprise me what I saw, but it truly grieved my heart. The girls had taken the camera into their rooms and posed in a variety of “model” like poses, but very much in a sexualized nature which doesn’t need to be described or shown here. Little girls that can appear so innocent and unaware of the world around them have in reality been influenced by the “babysitter” and the print advertising that bombards this culture. They have been shown what the world deems beautiful and they are trying to imitate it. These are the women they are trying to emulate and it simply breaks my heart and causes me to ask the question: what can I do to make a difference?

If you are reading this I simply ask that you pause for a moment and pray for these kids. Pray for these children who have been subject to images and experiences that would make most parents cringe. Pray that they will be surrounded by positive mentors, and if at all possible, parents who will instill them with values and Truth. Pray for those that have experienced sexual abuse and that they will experience healing through Christ. Pray for Ukraine; pray that the Christians here will remain pure and healthy in a country that is so full of sexual images and pornography and pray that laws will be created to restrict what currently is freely accessible.

This is a war. A war that is leaving in its wake the innocence of orphaned children.

Weekend in Kherson

We had quite a bit of fun Saturday and Sunday with the kids in the Kherson Internat. These are all kids we've come to know and love through our camp ministries and our trips with the Shoemaker play to the US each Christmas. The kids were very excited to see me and my friend Yulia and also to meet my friends Erik and Natasha. I hope to get back again soon- as I just love these kids!

Adventures in Babysitting

Remember that movie from the 80's? Adventures in Babysitting? Well thankfully babysitting my 5 cousins in Kiev is nothing like that-- but it always proves to be a fun little adventure. I feel so blessed to be a part of their lives and love all the roles I get to play-- cousin, older sister, friend, and this week- mother! Now I hope our McDonald's night last night doesn't mean I'm going to be a "push over" of a mom someday. No, I'd like to think it means I'm just a fun babysitter! :) You have to feel a tinge of guilt though when you see the consumption of 5 big macs, fries, cokes and ice-cream cones! Oh well...we went for a nice walk in the park today to burn off those grams of fat! :) It still amazes me how much I love McDonalds so much in Ukraine...when I avoid it like the plague in America. This seems to be the opinion of all the Americans I know in Ukraine. A fact that bonds us!

I even had my first driving experience in Kiev this weekend. Call me brave, or crazy, but I loaded my 5 sweeties into their car and got us all to church on time this morning. You wouldn't think that driving here is a great feat unless you've been here. But in all honestly, Sundays are quite friendly to the novice Kiev driver, so I felt quite confident in my 11 years behind the wheel preparing me for today.

So 5 more days of fun and adventures with these kiddos!

Waiting for the Parade

Well I just finished a 3 night run of the play "Waiting for the Parade" with 5 senior girls at Kiev Christian Academy! We had a blast and had a great turn out-- probably close to 250 over the 3 nights! It was fantastic and so much fun. I was so proud of my girls and our audiences were very impressed as well-- I received so many compliments on their behalf. I've known most of these girls since they were in 8th grade, so I've had the opportunity to see them grow and mature over the years into very talented actresses and just awesome young women. I'll sure miss them next year! Usually I just direct one show a year at KCA- in the spring, so this was an added bonus-- for me and them! So now that we've finished this one we have to hurry up and start rehearsing for the next one-- May will be here before we know it! Enjoy the photos!

Getting back into the swing

So by the lack of posts lately you can see I've been busy- well that and I've been trying to think of something interesting to write about! I've been back in Kiev now for 2 weeks after my 2 month trip to the states.


The last few weeks with my family were very full, with a lot of great time doing my new favorite thing-- spending time with my adorable nephew Caleb. Then I headed to Virginia for a few days of catching up with some dear friends and having some meetings at our CBN office in VA Beach. I was blessed to reconnect with two families who became close friends to me through their adoption processes in Ukraine- 2 years ago! I continue to count all these adoptive families I've come to know and love over the years as such a blessing in my life, and having walked through the adoption journey with them I feel extra connected- in a weird maternal sort of way-- and I'm not even a mother!

With Erin- adopted in '06 and Katya-adopted 1 month ago

With Luda and Galina Hughes- adopted in 2006

Then it was back to Kiev and straight back to work. In many ways it seemed like I had never left! I've been working on a special play with the senior girls at the High School where I direct drama, and our performances are next weekend. So nothing like just getting back and putting the final touches on a full length play! Life is full to say the least. My girls have been doing great and we are really excited for this coming weekend and are hoping for full audiences.

I was also able to connect with another Colorado family I've come to know (via email) who was here adopting 2 kids that we had brought over on previous hosting trips. Again, another blessing to get to meet them and be a witness yet again to the miracle of adoption.

With Jim Volf and 2 new kids, Joshua and Ashley

(wife Kari already at home)

So hopefully I can get back to this blogging thing again -to keep everyone updated on the happenings here in Ukraine--both the mundane and the extraordinary!

The Faces

These are the faces I'll never forget-- the 10 children we brought with us on our US trip for the peformance of "The Old Russian Shoemaker."

Nika...Alla...Oksana...Valery...Sasha...Yana...Vika...Zhenya...Zina...and Dima...

They are back in Kherson now, but their faces continue to be on my mind. Will they be adopted? Will this trip have made a lasting impact on them? Will those that they met continue to pray for them? Will they seek after God?

These are the questions I have and the direction of my prayers. Please continue to pray for these children- each of these faces represents another 10,000 like them living in Ukraine.

Philadelphia and Denver?? And a very WHITE Christmas...

The last 5 days of our Christmas tour had us based out of Philadelphia. We even had a performance in New Jersey-- giving us a grand total of 7 states that we visited. Not bad bragging rights for a group of kids from Ukraine! They loved adding to their "state" count along the way. I managed to get a quick tour of the city

before we flew out on Tuesday night. A nice young man took me on a quick 3 hour blitz tour, showing me the city's highlights- including the steps that "Rocky" ran up (yes, I ran them too) and the Liberty Bell. Then it was off to airport with our group of 20 people and 40 perfectly (so we thought) weighed bags. Over weight bag charges are crazy these days...so we were determined to make every bag weigh in correctly-- and these kids had a lot of stuff! One bag was 3 kilos over and the guy was was going to charge us $150- until we pulled the "orphan" card on him and he finally let it slide (and really, guilt is not one of my favorite tactics...but that is what we did--please forgive us). Thank you kind Lufthansa man for your baggage mercy.

After we went through security I departed from my sweet kids and traveling companions of the last 3 weeks with promises to visit them in Kherson once I get back to Kiev in January.
I then headed to my own gate for my flight bound to Seattle......via Denver. I had been a little worried about getting there with all the bad weather out in Seattle lately- but little did I suspect that it would be a broken lavatory and not snow that would become my problem. The hour and half delay fixing the lavatory caused me to have all of 5 minutes to make my connecting Seattle flight. Of course I'm at the back of a very full plane, making getting out a challenge. I go running to my gate and see my plane---thinking- yeah- I made it! But no, they had shut the door and were letting no more late people on. What?? It's Christmas!! I try and plead with the gate lady to let me on--but this time I don't have the orphan card to pull and there is no mercy to get me on the plane. Bye bye Seattle...hello Denver! :)

This little mishap however turned out to be a BIG blessing. I have a group of friends in the Denver area that have become very dear to me via email- but I had never met them! Kris and Clarke Stoesz are a part of a ministry called Ukraine Orphan Outreach and I have worked with them and others over the last year to bring groups of kids to the US for a hosting/camp program. They are a great couple and I communicate with them a lot-- but had never met them, and my missed flight allowed us to finally meet. They were so sweet picking me up at the airport at 11:00 at night and bringing me to their home and then getting me back at 7:30 the next morning for my flight. Thanks Kris and Clarke!! You guys are wonderful and it was a blessing to finally meet you both!
I made it home Christmas Eve morning to the whitest Seattle I've ever seen. Where my parent's live it is like a mountain pass. We have over 2 feet of snow...and we had even more falling this morning. It is pretty...but it isn't allowing us to go anywhere! So Christmas was a little different today as we weren't able to see my brother's family. I did feel a bit like a kid today though-- my mom and I went sledding and made a snowman!

My mom and I with our Snowman Jose

We had our fun...now I'm ready for it to go away!! :)

I pray you had a wonderful Christmas!!

Around New York

Well we've been in New York for a week- and praise God all our kids are now healthy! Thanks for your prayers-- all was looking better after we arrived in Rochester last Thursday night and a good night's sleep did everyone good. For the last week we were based out of Rochester, NY and made trips to Syracuse, Utica, Buffalo and Binghamton. If I said we were doing a lot of driving that would be an understatement. We are doing a LOT of driving. Did I mention several of our kids get car sick easily?
After our performance in Buffalo we made a trip to one of the wonders of the world- Niagara Falls. It was pretty spectacular and also pretty darn cold. We lasted for all of 10 minutes enjoying the beauty of the falls before we dashed back to the car to warm up. For many of the kids it was the first time ever seeing a waterfall, let alone one of the wonders of the world! So great.

Tomorrow we head on to our last stop...Philadelphia. 4 more performances and then we fly out on Tuesday- the group back to Kiev, while I'll be heading home for Christmas with my family.

As you can see I've "re-vamped" my blog a bit. I had a few hours on my hands tonight and figured I'd get creative. I've also given my blog a new title- "beauty from the ashes"-- this reference comes from Isaiah 61, and is a passage I memorized with my small group this fall. It reminds me of who Jesus is - how he is actively restoring beauty to the hurt and the dark places in all of our lives. Perhaps I see that hurt and darkness amplified in these children as I hear their stories, and the evil things their eyes have already seen- and the utter abandonment that they feel. So thus I am drawn back to this passage again tonight, reminding myself of the work Jesus has called me to and the promises he has for the least of these. I pray that Jesus not only provides families, but brings healing to their lives...and the others around me.

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,
to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,

and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.

Isaiah 61:1-3

Car Sick...Air Sick...sick sick...please...no more sick!!

So we are currently stuck for awhile in the JFK airport as we await our flight to Rochester NY-- and has it been a day and a half!!!! Praise God we are all still alive and continuing to function...though some of these little ones just barely it seems.
Our day started off at 8am, meeting at the church to load into the cars to make the trip to the airport in Charlotte- a 2 hour drive. When we all met up we saw instantly that little Nika and Oksana were both very sick with high fevers and did not look ready to face the long day before them. Just three of us adults (the women) were flying with the kids, so we divided up all 11 kids into 3 cars to make our way to the airport.

Car #1-- That's the car I'm in with the two fever girls....20 minutes into the trip-- throwing up into plastic bags. Oh Jesus- let this trip be over soon.

Car #2-- This car contains Alla, our little girl prone to motion sickness-- we arrive at the gas station for a potty break...Alla throws up.

Car #3-- This car is being driven by a younger guy who is from the church...it is raining and young guy is driving a little too fast...car spins and gets in an accident. Everyone is okay- but two kids hit their heads and 2 are throwing up everywhere...over all their clothes. These kids arrive to the airport in desperate need of a clothing change...but nevertheless in pretty good spirits.

Flight # 1-- Little Alla, again the motion sick one, is sitting by me...and we quickly get moved to the front of the plane when the flight attendant realizes she is about to throw up. Apparently he doesn't want to create the "school bus" effect....I can only imagine what that might mean. No thank you! So I sat by her holding her hair back...getting my first lessons of being mama to a sick child. (Makes me thank my mother for all that hair holding way back when). Two other kids in our group were throwing up on the flight as well...I'm sure we entertained those around us.

So anyway.... not to have a totally gross out of a blog entry...but these are the things I'm thinking about as I'm sitting in the airport surrounded by 11 children...several of which still don't smell too good. We were delayed in getting here so missed our connecting flight- so now we are stuck waiting for almost 5 hours for our next flight...which will be all of 50 min long and will get us into Rochester close to midnight! And to think our day started at 8am!

Please please pray for our little ones...Oksana and Nika really need their fevers to break. These are the moments that make you really remember about why these kids need families. All of them. Kids shouldn't have to be sick, crying and tired without a mama near by. This is what breaks my heart the most. We praise God for His protection today and that all the kids were safe.

A taste of the south...

So the last week has consisted of home stays and performances in the Atlanta area and in Asheville, North Carolina. We are getting our miles in that is for sure. The kids are getting a bit tired though...I think they would rather stay put. We are having lots of fun --even if we've eaten enough pizza to last us the rest of our lives. At first the kids were excited at the sight of pizza...now they are turning up their noses to it. Pretty funny. Tomorrow we are packing up tomorrow and heading up to Rochester, NY.

In Atlanta I was able to be reunited at one of the performances with a dear family who I helped with an adoption last year and have stayed in contact with. It was so wonderful to see the boys, who are now 17 and 19 and see how great they are doing and how their English is coming along great! It's fun to be traveling to places that allow me to reconnect with people I've met over the years. Even tonight in Asheville, NC- a woman who used to be a missionary in Ukraine and led a small group I was in, came to our performance. I didn't even know she lived here now! Such a small world.

On dasher on dancer on prancer on Vixen....
now on to New York....

Alla, Zina and Oksana

Sasha (R) learning to drive with his new little friend Eduard

with the girls at the "Bethlehem Walk" in Atlanta

Florida Fun

Our week in Florida went by fast! We began with home stays in Tampa- and a trip south to Sarasota for an afternoon at the beach and a performance in the evening. On Tuesday we headed north to Jacksonville where we were hosted by another large Slavic church. Just one performance in Jacksonville and a free day to explore the city- including St. Augustine- America's oldest, longest inhabited city (apparently I slept through history class, as this was new information for me.) The kids are doing great so far, especially considering all the time on the road and the fact that we have been living in several different families. It obviously helps that we have been staying in the homes of Russian and Ukrainian immigrants, so language has not been an issue.

So far we have had 4 performances of The Old Russian Shoemaker...so that leaves 16 more to go! Whew!! I'll be singing these songs in my sleep by the time we are done. We made the trek from Jacksonville to Atlanta yesterday-- talk about a temperature difference!! Time to dig out those winter coats we had tucked away. It's Atlanta till Monday and then we pack up again to head to Asheville, NC. I'm beginning to feel like a true roady...just with 11 children in tow! We are continuing to praise God for this opportunity we have been given to share about our ministries and to expose these kids to families and a special holiday experience. We have been so blessed by the people we have met.

These are two of my favorite pictures from our time in Florida. This is the first Santa I've ever seen on the beach- in a Hawaiian shirt at that. And with the sign...I'm still trying to figure out what it means to molest an alligator?

Now on to Atlanta....

With my sweet Oksana on the 6 hour bus journey...

30 suitcases, 11 kids, 9 adults, 7 hour lay-over and a partridge in a pear tree

We made it to sunny Tampa Florida late Friday night and so far we are off to a great start!! The kids did great on all the flights-- despite the every ten minute question of "when are we going to get on the next plane?" And then once on the plane, "how much longer till we get there?"

Before... After....

They slept on the flights which was good and were all eager eyed when we landed in America--and even more excited when they realized we got to ditch the winter coats.

Our first day consisted of a trip to Payless shoes to purchase new shoes for all, a tour through the Botanical gardens, a trip to the beach- and swimming in a pool. Not a bad first day for these kiddos!

Yesterday was our first performance and it went great! We have 2 more Florida peformances before we head up to Atlanta.

Stay tuned....